In law finally left just about when my one month confinement was over. It was the right timing in that she probably could use some rest and we were also ready to be on our own again. But boy, the first Monday being by myself, I was not mentally to do anything - I mean anything like going out, cooking, etc other than taking care of Katelyn. What made it worst was the Saturday before that we met a friendly-turned-nasty neighbor in the new house that just added to my anxiety. I remember having to pick up Ryan in the afternoon was such a huge undertaking. Perhaps that was a little bit of post partum that I was experiencing. I knew I needed to take it slowly; so the next day, I was able to add laundry to the to-do list. Toward the end of the week, God sent me a good friend, Jessica, to just help around the house. That was very thoughtful of her and I am thankful for that. She brought lunch and held baby, and even picked up Ryan for me one time. I must say the support from the church family has been tremendous....from the gifts to bringing pots after pots of soup. That's gotta be the blessing that comes only from serving Him.
Adjusting to the new life has been a bit harder than I thought. Katelyn esp. needing to be held alot...well, perhaps we are a bit less discipline about that with her figuring that she will be our last baby to hold...honestly I can hardly remember much about this period with Ryan. How did I spend my days? I guess I didn't take my time to enjoy him as much I should have back then. We both agree that we seem to enjoy this little more. She sleeps with us most of the time too. I call her a little mieu mieu cause she is tiny :). BTW, I hope she turns lighter soon and that her double eyelids will finally show!
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Dec 2009
Dec 12- It was Charles' bday..we went up to the city for a family xmas pic and also get some car business done, my mucus plug came out and I had a haunch she might come that day...
Finally when we went to pick up Ryan at Awana, I knew the cramp isn't just occasional thing, it was definitely labor pain. So, we went to the hospital directly around 10 pm. Mandy came and picked up Ryan to bring him home.
Once we were admitted, I was dilated to 4. They asked me for pain med and I said sure. That's when my nightmare began. The anestheisologist took forever to put the med in and once she did, I was shocked to be numb to the extend that I did. I could not feel my leg and upper body....the feeling was so scary seeing people move me and yet I didn't feel a thing. When I had to push, I didn't know what the heck I was doing but she came out. 6 lb 7 oz 19.75" at 12:01 am. With all the hoopla, she just had to miss her daddy's birthday.
When I wheeled to the maternity room, I remember telling Charles that I'd better be able to walk again. I was genuinely scared for being paralyzed. The helplessness was unspeakable. Then it literally took 5 hours before I could feel my legs again. What a relief!
While keep Katelyn in the room, I was feeding and resting in a bad position and it brought on a massive muscle pain and headache. Finally once we got home, I was nursing her on the bed and it probably also caused my pelvus pain as well. That was excruciating. I literally looked at my king size bed in tears because every time I had to climb in and out of the bed, my pelvic muscles would hurt so badly and it radiates down my back thigh. I prayed and ppl gave me chinese pads and finally it took 2nd week for the pain to go away. I remember thinking there is no way I am having any more babies....vaginal stitch pain, headache, milk engorgement and stress, and then this pelvic pain, that's way too much. But those days still passed. I don't know how I got through them.
Katelyn has been a joy. I didn't get to enjoy her much at the hospital with all of my own problems. But once we are into the 2nd week and things are more routine (well, at least my milk is enough for her now and not much aches and pains on my part), I definitely got to slow down and think about what she really means to us. I remember thinking I would pray that I would be there for her confinement. Somehow I just think that a woman's blessing is definitely to have her mom take care of her during confinement. I thought about my mom alot one night....just imagining how life would be different if she were around. These last few days, I am more struck by the fact that we really brought a new life here and we would need to start training her up all over again. The weight of responsibility finally sinks in. I try to enjoy her while feeding her. I relish the sight of her grabbing on my shirt and her other hand rest on her head while she feeds. I giggle at all the funny sounds she makes. Ryan has been loving to her. He loves to kiss her and touches her hair. He enjoys holding her too. He is adjusting fairly well except that he has some usual disciplinary issues that we need to deal with.
We still cannot tell whom she looks like yet. But we just take each moment slowly and treasure the time now. As I look at her fingers and toes, I cannot help but marvel at the creator. God made her in my womb. Thank you for the gift, Lord.
Finally when we went to pick up Ryan at Awana, I knew the cramp isn't just occasional thing, it was definitely labor pain. So, we went to the hospital directly around 10 pm. Mandy came and picked up Ryan to bring him home.
Once we were admitted, I was dilated to 4. They asked me for pain med and I said sure. That's when my nightmare began. The anestheisologist took forever to put the med in and once she did, I was shocked to be numb to the extend that I did. I could not feel my leg and upper body....the feeling was so scary seeing people move me and yet I didn't feel a thing. When I had to push, I didn't know what the heck I was doing but she came out. 6 lb 7 oz 19.75" at 12:01 am. With all the hoopla, she just had to miss her daddy's birthday.
When I wheeled to the maternity room, I remember telling Charles that I'd better be able to walk again. I was genuinely scared for being paralyzed. The helplessness was unspeakable. Then it literally took 5 hours before I could feel my legs again. What a relief!
While keep Katelyn in the room, I was feeding and resting in a bad position and it brought on a massive muscle pain and headache. Finally once we got home, I was nursing her on the bed and it probably also caused my pelvus pain as well. That was excruciating. I literally looked at my king size bed in tears because every time I had to climb in and out of the bed, my pelvic muscles would hurt so badly and it radiates down my back thigh. I prayed and ppl gave me chinese pads and finally it took 2nd week for the pain to go away. I remember thinking there is no way I am having any more babies....vaginal stitch pain, headache, milk engorgement and stress, and then this pelvic pain, that's way too much. But those days still passed. I don't know how I got through them.
Katelyn has been a joy. I didn't get to enjoy her much at the hospital with all of my own problems. But once we are into the 2nd week and things are more routine (well, at least my milk is enough for her now and not much aches and pains on my part), I definitely got to slow down and think about what she really means to us. I remember thinking I would pray that I would be there for her confinement. Somehow I just think that a woman's blessing is definitely to have her mom take care of her during confinement. I thought about my mom alot one night....just imagining how life would be different if she were around. These last few days, I am more struck by the fact that we really brought a new life here and we would need to start training her up all over again. The weight of responsibility finally sinks in. I try to enjoy her while feeding her. I relish the sight of her grabbing on my shirt and her other hand rest on her head while she feeds. I giggle at all the funny sounds she makes. Ryan has been loving to her. He loves to kiss her and touches her hair. He enjoys holding her too. He is adjusting fairly well except that he has some usual disciplinary issues that we need to deal with.
We still cannot tell whom she looks like yet. But we just take each moment slowly and treasure the time now. As I look at her fingers and toes, I cannot help but marvel at the creator. God made her in my womb. Thank you for the gift, Lord.
Last Quarter of 2009
Wow, so much has transpired in the last quarter of 2009...it will be a task to summarize it now....
Oct - not too eventful...
Nov - Mandy arrived in mid of the month for a 5 wk stay of her business trip. Definitely more work on my part having her here....cooking, transportation etc. But I guess it's nice to have her around. She was quite stressed about the whole work arrangement but for now the job seems to be safe.
Nov 12 - Finally the unthinkable happened. I went into work with just a slight inclination that I might be rif'ed but hardly did I think it would actually happened. When Moni stopped by my cube and asked me to go with her, I knew. It was undoubtedly a very emotional experience. In some ways, it was very surreal as if I had to get a grip on how best to react to it. For sure, it definitely helped me learn how to react to someone else in the future. It was a very pride thing I guess. I think it took me a couple days to just accept it and realize it that this is God's blessing in disguise. Now I do not have to struggle with the decision and all the maternity and unemployment benefits are there for me to take advantage of...how bad can it be?!
To take the leave early was actually a good thing. I needed that extra time to clean out stuff for the bb. With Ryan being in school, those few weeks were probably the most stressless and free!
The Corolla Incident - how can we top this one? On our way to take Mandy to visit Uncle Wong's family, Charles' happened to drive the corolla for this trip and while we were on 280, I noticed something was quite right and little did I know that he was trying to stop an uncontrollable car! It sped up from 70 to 90 mph and the brake would not work. Once we realized the situation, we weren't so much panic as we could not believe that was happening, so we prayed. Praise God, he was able to slow and brake the car eventually. Then we went on our way for the rest of the business....later we found that a loose cable from previous mechanic work very likely has caused it. But that was big enough of a scare for us to look for a car. As much as I tried not to buy anything, I had to give in on this one. So, we have a 2007 Honda Odyssey sitting outside!
Oct - not too eventful...
Nov - Mandy arrived in mid of the month for a 5 wk stay of her business trip. Definitely more work on my part having her here....cooking, transportation etc. But I guess it's nice to have her around. She was quite stressed about the whole work arrangement but for now the job seems to be safe.
Nov 12 - Finally the unthinkable happened. I went into work with just a slight inclination that I might be rif'ed but hardly did I think it would actually happened. When Moni stopped by my cube and asked me to go with her, I knew. It was undoubtedly a very emotional experience. In some ways, it was very surreal as if I had to get a grip on how best to react to it. For sure, it definitely helped me learn how to react to someone else in the future. It was a very pride thing I guess. I think it took me a couple days to just accept it and realize it that this is God's blessing in disguise. Now I do not have to struggle with the decision and all the maternity and unemployment benefits are there for me to take advantage of...how bad can it be?!
To take the leave early was actually a good thing. I needed that extra time to clean out stuff for the bb. With Ryan being in school, those few weeks were probably the most stressless and free!
The Corolla Incident - how can we top this one? On our way to take Mandy to visit Uncle Wong's family, Charles' happened to drive the corolla for this trip and while we were on 280, I noticed something was quite right and little did I know that he was trying to stop an uncontrollable car! It sped up from 70 to 90 mph and the brake would not work. Once we realized the situation, we weren't so much panic as we could not believe that was happening, so we prayed. Praise God, he was able to slow and brake the car eventually. Then we went on our way for the rest of the business....later we found that a loose cable from previous mechanic work very likely has caused it. But that was big enough of a scare for us to look for a car. As much as I tried not to buy anything, I had to give in on this one. So, we have a 2007 Honda Odyssey sitting outside!
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